A new study looks at whether “cold feet” before marriage is a normal nervous feeling to be disregarded, or if it is a legitimate warning sign and predictor of divorce.
In a UCLA study led by doctoral psychology student Justin Lavner, it was discovered that marriages in which brides had doubts before saying “I do” had a two-and-a-half times higher chance of ending in divorce within 4 years.
Lavner’s team studied 232 couples is Los Angeles during their first few months of marriage, then checked back in every 6 months for a span of 4 years. They found that although newlywed husbands had more doubts before marriage (47%), the wives’ doubts (38%) were a much better predictor of the fate of the marriage. In fact, 19% of wives who reported uncertainties about getting married were divorced 4 years later, while only 8% who did not have those feelings were divorced in this time frame.
Researchers found that many people have apprehensions about getting married. Only 36% of couples studied reported having no doubts before the wedding. “People think everybody has premarital doubts and you don’t have to worry about them,” Lavner said. “We found they are common but not benign.” Lavin assured that doubts don’t necessarily mean doom for the relationship, but researchers recommend that couples address any issues they may have before getting married. Lavin is not advising women with doubts to necessarily end their relationship, but he warned “there’s no evidence that problems in a marriage just go away and get better. If anything, problems are more likely to escalate.”
Marriage is not a solution to ongoing issues. Couples need to talk about them and work through them. When women have these uncertainties they should not be lightly dismissed. If you are considering filing for divorce, contact an expert Albaugh Law divorce attorney in St. Augustine,FL for a free legal consultation.